Winter at our house is pretty much a Hallmark movie—until you factor in our two German Shepherds, Sweets and Dolly. If you’ve ever wondered what pure joy looks like, just imagine two massive fur missiles blasting through a snow-covered yard, tails wagging like they’re trying to generate electricity. Then comes the big dog mess.
The Hallmark Movie Snow Play Routine
The thing about Sweets and Dolly is that they don’t just play in the snow. No, they have a full winter routine. It starts with the classic zoomies—think NASCAR, but fluffier and with fewer pit stops. Then there’s the snow face-dive, where they burrow face-first into the powder like furry submarines hunting for enemy tennis balls. Finally, they break into a synchronized snow-wrestling match that could rival professional wrestling—if professional wrestling involved more ear biting and less suplexing.
The Muddy Consequence
Now, you might be thinking, “Wow, that sounds magical!” And it is…until they come inside. See, snow melts. And when you have two large dogs with enough fur to stuff a mattress, that snow turns into a muddy mess. Our once clean floors end up looking like a crime scene from a spaghetti western—just swap out the blood for muddy paw prints.
The Crate Solution
After about the fifth floor-mopping incident (and one memorable slip that ended with me questioning my life choices while sprawled on the tile), we came up with a foolproof plan: post-snow kennel time. When the dogs come in, they go straight into their crates so we can dry them off. Simple, right?
Outsmarted by Dogs
Wrong.
You see, German Shepherds are smart. Like, “could probably file their own taxes if they had thumbs” smart. At first, the system worked great. They’d zoom around outside, get called back in, and trot into their crates like obedient little angels. We were finally winning at life.
The Great Snow Rebellion
Until one day, they figured it out.
Apparently, our brilliant canine duo connected the dots: “If we come inside, we get locked in our crates. Therefore, if we don’t come inside…freedom!”
Now, calling them in has become a masterclass in doggy defiance. We stand at the door, freezing, calling their names with increasing levels of desperation:
The Peanut Butter Bribe
“Sweets! Dolly! Come inside!”
They pause their snow-wrestling match just long enough to glance at us. Then—AND I SWEAR THEY SMIRK—they take off running again like they’re auditioning for a dog food commercial.
Treats? Doesn’t work. Toys? Forget it. The only thing that lures them back inside is the promise of something even better than snow wrestling: peanut butter. But even then, they take their sweet time, stopping to frolic dramatically as if they’re being filmed in slow motion.
Post-Snow Drying Drama
And when they finally come in? The drama isn’t over. They know the crates are next. Suddenly, these same dogs who just sprinted laps around the yard become Olympic-level protestors. Dolly perfects the “flop,” where she collapses dramatically on the floor as if she’s fainted from the injustice. Sweets goes for the “no bones” approach, turning into a puddle of fur that you have to physically scoop up like an oversized sack of potatoes.
The Joy of Snow Days
After much grumbling (from both sides), they end up in their crates, drying off while giving us the saddest, most guilt-inducing puppy eyes you can imagine. You’d think we’d sentenced them to life in solitary confinement instead of a 10-minute towel-off.
But here’s the thing—despite the snow games, the stubborn streaks, and the muddy floors, we wouldn’t trade them for anything. Watching their goofy antics in the snow reminds us of what pure happiness looks like. Plus, let’s be real—there’s something hilarious about two big dogs outsmarting two fully grown humans.
Big Dog Mess Lessons Learned
So, next time it snows, we’ll be ready. We’ll arm ourselves with peanut butter, towels, and maybe some better bribes. Because as much as we joke, we kind of love being outsmarted by our four-legged snow enthusiasts.
Just…maybe with fewer muddy floors next time.
